Nobody likes a party pooper. But I can’t see stupidity and just let it stand, especially when it’s going to mislead thousands of already disadvantaged job-seekers. The harmful stupidity I refer to is an article on CNN.com called Ten promising jobs for class of 2009 (but don’t go there just yet, I have some explaining to do). The article, written by Careerbuilder, is a blatant example of how some companies will spread misinformation just to sell a product.

What’s so bad about the article? I’ll tell you what. The article claims to compile a list of growing jobs for the year of 2009, saying:

“To help your search and calm your nerves, we’ve put together a list of 10 jobs that college grads should look for this year.” 

Then, claiming to compile data from the National Association of Colleges and Employers’ (NACE) Job Outlook 2009 and the Bureau of Labor Statistics’ (BLS) Occupational Outlook Handbook, they come up with a list of ten “healthy” job sectors. In reality, however, they flat out disregard data from NACE and quote outdated, pre-financial meltdown numbers from BLS (their handbook was written before 2006 and the world has changed considerably since then).

Let’s see what NACE really had to say about job prospects in 2009:

“College Hiring Flat for Class of 2009’
“Current projected hiring for the Class of 2009 shows very little growth over the hiring levels for the Class of 2008, but no expected decline.”

In fact, NACE found marked decreases in recruiting in business services (-3.1%) and only tiny increases in Professional Services (1.7%).

Then they use statistics from before 2006 to fabricate some sunny news. I mean, they used numbers created in 2005. In 2005, people still thought adjustable rate mortgages were a great idea. Americans liked George W. Bush enough to vote him in for a second term. People thought that in money markets, the stock market, and the real estate market the sky was the limit. Needless to say, things were different.

This should tick off anyone who knows anything about projections and the job market. There is no way these numbers are accurate for our times. There is no way the writer, Careerbuilder, or CNN actually thought this was based on solid facts. And yet, CNN has allowed Careerbuilder to slap this crap up on their page and pass it off as journalism, as advice to embattled job-seekers.

Kind of makes you sick, doesn’t it?

The writer of this article knows better. Careerbuilder knows better. CNN definitely knows better. Kind of makes you wonder what other crap they are feeding us.

Check out the crap for yourself…

The last six months have been a wild ride for our economy. We had our official financial meltdown at the beginning of October. The first bailout came and went. Insurance and banking giants continued to fall. U.S automakers teetered on the edge of failure propped up only by the government. Millions of jobs have been lost since the start of the year. A second bailout (er, stimulus, I mean) was approved. Bailed out companies have continued to post dismal results. And all throughout, economists, financial gurus, and conspiracy theorists alike have been prognosticating such calamities as the collapse of the U.S. dollar, the Second Great Depression, food shortages, and civil instability. Journalists both fringe and mainstream are becoming more comfortable with revolutionary language.  And yet, with so many storm clouds on the horizon, why does it seem like we have just stalled, like we’re just sitting on the precipice looking at the view below?

True, real life change does not happen at the pace of a TV disaster miniseries (gosh, I miss those). But for all the bad stuff that has happened and the harrowing stuff that’s being foretold, it feels like we’re in limbo.

Please note, I am in no way happy about our nation plunging into an economic hellhole. I like peace and plenty. But I’ve done enough homework to know, and I’ve listened to enough credible voices to know, that we are not going to get a free pass on this one. I would like to believe that we dodged the bullet and it’s time to rebuild. But that belief would in no way be built on logic or reason. It’s time to pay the piper and our credit cards are maxed out.

In my opinion, that leaves only one explanation for the current state of limbo in which we find ourselves. This is the calm before the storm, the deep breath before going over the falls.

So, ask yourself: what do you do when you’re about to go over the falls?

Do you make sure your seatbelt is on tight? Do you get ready to scream your head off and wait to hit the bottom? Do you bail out and swim for shore? Do you just enjoy the view, the cool mist of the falls? Do you just close your eyes and hope you’re still alive at the bottom?

I like to think that I and my neighbors would get out and start swimming the other direction. By the looks of things, however, most people are looking around, enjoying the view, hoping against hope that someone will turn the boat around. Yet others are taking a deep breath, preparing to scream their lungs raw.

Which one are you?

Unemployment figures continue to rise. The word ‘layoff’ has become a boogeyman, a spectre waiting just outside our door to snatch away all we hold dear. Every time the next round of layoffs is announced, each of us imagines ourselves in that position.

You know how it goes. The boss calls you in, hands you the slip of doom, and tells you he had to get rid of someone. "Fine," you sniff with cardboard box in hand. "I never liked this place anyway."

But then comes the really hard part. After you’ve loaded up your things, said goodbye to the vending machines, and been escorted down to the curb, you realize you’re gonna have to tell someone about your forced explusion. If you’re married, your spouse’s face appears in your mind. You will have to tell them you failed. When times got tough, you couldn’t make the cut. Why, the shame is almost more than you can bear.

I’ve been there before and it sucks. But there are some things you can do to manage the heartache of getting the boot. Try these five exercises and watch your laid-off stress fly away:

1. Kick the Cat/Dog/Hamster - Ah, nothing like a little physical action to loosen up the old nerves. And that cat has had it coming for months, using your pool table as a scratching post. So get a running start. Kick with all your might. It’s up. It’s GOOD. Now doesn’t that feel swell?

2. Take a Day Off – That’s right. You didn’t get laid off. You took a vacation. A well-deserved vacation, now that you mention it. When all those non-laid-off shlubs are working their tails off in cubicle-land, you can do whatever you want. "Sucks to be you!" you can cackle as you drive away.

3. Watch an Inspirational Movie – Crying is good for unclogging the emotional plumbing. Try watching a movie about a born loser who gets kicked around but then hits the big time. Think Rocky, Rudy, or The Pursuit of Happyness. Picture yourself in the lead role. Shake your fist at the man. Shed tears. Finish carton of bon bons. Repeat several times.

4. Work Out – Give stress and self-pity the boot with a hearty workout. Swim ten miles. Scale a mountain. Anything to bring back that sense of accomplishment. You will be flying so high on endorphins that you may forget you have no money.

5. Get a Hug – Nothing chases away the bluebirds like a good embrace. Maybe it’s your spouse, your kids, your mom, or your cousin Larry. Sometimes you just need someone to put their arms around you and tell you it’s going to be okay. That’s right. Let it all out.

Seriously, a layoff is just the beginning of a new chapter in your life, probably a good one. So tackle it with a little self-pity, a dash of avoidance, and then go back out to take on the world.