Archive for the ‘Choosing a School’ Category
Tuesday, May 27th, 2008
We, the male population, had it coming, I suppose. After centuries of keeping women down with often unfair social mores and sometimes ridiculous fashion demands, we had to expect that someday there would be a backlash, that one day the “fairer sex” would come out swinging, eager to dispel those centuries of oppression. Well, newsflash for all you guys out there and congratulations to all the ladies: that day has arrived.
Women are officially kicking boys’ butts in the classroom. That’s right, the ivory towers once inhabited almost solely by men have been invaded and repossessed by women. According to statistics, 60 percent of college students are now female. Women earn 170,000 more bachelor degrees annually than their male counterparts. The ratios of females to males at business and medical schools are steadily rising, and at law schools, women now hold a majority. Meanwhile, increasing numbers of boys from elementary to high school are struggling to meet minimum requirements.
Where did this trend come from? A few theories exist. One claims that females, who tend toward cooperation, collaboration, multi-tasking, and sitting quietly, are socially better suited for the traditional school system; boys, who crave adventure, competition, and physical activity, tend to be square pegs in round holes, so to speak, in school. Other theories suggest that the feminist movement, with its constant barrage of “girl power” messaging, and the relative silence from the male side is responsible for this dramatic shift. For nearly 40 years now, girls have had armies of supporters telling them they carry the torch for those who didn’t have the chances they did. Boys, on the other hand, have had very little to fight for; encouragement usually involves athletics rather than academics.
Two bastions of male domination still remain, however: management and salary. Males still vastly outnumber females in management roles. Average male salaries in comparable positions uniformly outpace those of their female counterparts.
It may just be a matter of time before those women who now fill universities spread into the companies of the world. It may just be a matter of time before women come to dominate business, politics, and life as we know it. It may be just a matter of time before men find themselves wearing really uncomfortable corsets and having to watch their figures. (Kiss your 32 oz. steaks and belching contests goodbye!)
All of Mom’s advice about being nice to girls totally makes sense now. Back then, it was about chivalry. In the future, it may be about survival.
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Monday, May 12th, 2008
Some mascots are symbols of power and prowess, like the USC Trojan or the LSU Tiger. And, um, some aren’t. Going instead for cuteness or humor has left some schools with less-than-cool mascots. These mascots provide comic relief (Isn’t that what drunk, fat guys are for?), but I pity the football team that has to march out onto the field behind one of these. You would almost have to be extra fierce to make up for a big dorky toadstool or a rainbow colored whatchamacallit. If you ask me, lame mascots really get your team off on the wrong foot in the intimidation department.
Some glaring examples of lame mascots appear below. I hereby petition, in the interest of the sports teams that must be represented by these sorry ambassadors, that these mascots be removed and replaced by something cool. The five lamest college mascots are:
1. The Evergreen State College Geoduck - A geoduck is a mollusk with a bizarre tube protruding from its shell to propel it through the water. The geoduck, although the longest living mollusk in the world, is seriously lacking in the intimidation department. The costumed geoduck used at sporting events is no improvement on the boring creature.
2. The Ohio State Buckeye - A buckeye is a kind of nut. That’s right, a nut. True, it’s a tough nut to crack, but it’s still just a nut. Their costumed mascot is a hearty-looking fellow with a buckeye nut head- it looks like someone wearing one of those dog attack suits.
3. The Stanford Tree - Christmas trees may say alot of things, like ‘love’, ‘family,’ ‘the holidays’, and so on. But one thing they don’t say is, "Prepare for hell, you miserable cretins. Today you meet your maker!" The crooked eyes and loopy red lips don’t help either.
4. The Syracuse Orange - See all of the reasons in number 2.
5. The Saint Louis Milliken - If you’re wondering what a Milliken is, join the club. Milliken’s are an imaginary race of otherworldly creatures dreamed up, literally, by some lady. How they became a college mascot is beyond me. Can we expect to see Smurfs or TellyTubbies grace the sidelines? Heaven forbid.
Posted in Choosing a School, News & Entertainment, Preparing for School | 2 Comments »
Wednesday, May 7th, 2008
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College just doesn’t mean what it used to. One need only look to the recent drug bust at San Diego State to see this point driven home. Forget about discipline, higher learning, and character- college has become a big party. Colleges put students through rigorous admission processes only to let them run rampant once they get there. The result: a college diploma- especially one from San Diego State- doesn’t stand for anything.
College administration, parents, fraternities and sororities, and the students themselves are all to blame for this. Research has shown dramatic increases in alcoholism, illegal drug use, casual sexuality, and criminal behavior among U.S. college students. Keep in mind: these aren’t the gang members or high school dropouts or kids who hold up liquor stores. These kids are the cream of the crop, those who got high enough grades and test scores to get into four-year universities.
College administrations have lost their nerve when dealing with problem students. Maybe they are afraid to lose financial donations from proud parents. Maybe they are afraid to put a public black mark on their university by highlighting student rowdiness. Maybe they’re afraid to quell student individuality. Whatever the reason, their lax standards of conduct are steadily eroding any confidence in the quality of their institutions.
Fraternities and sororities have become laughable in the contradiction they represent. Check out this mission statement from Theta Chi, one of the fraternities embroiled in the San Diego State drug bust:
Theta Chi Fraternity exists to serve a need for young men of character, principles and ideals to associate with each other. Our chapters and colonies are laboratories for leadership. Our undergraduates grow, mature and develop through interaction with other outstanding young men.
Character? Principles? Ideals? When I read the phrase “laboratories for leadership,” the first things that came to mind were meth labs. Other fraternities involved claim to promote high ethics, community service, and positive contributions to the world and society. These mission statements are so far from the binge parties, hazing, and criminal behavior they have come to represent. These organizations no longer foster personal growth; they are just clubs, maybe gangs.
Lastly, these kids’ parents are clueless. In many cases, these students are funded by their parents. Their parents have the power to yank their misbehaving behinds out of college whenever they want. So why don’t parents crack down on or even seem to notice this behavior? Who knows? Fear of how it would look. Fear of making their kids angry. Fear that their kids will never go back to school if they pull them out. The old proverb goes, “Spare the rod, spoil the child.”
College administration, fraternity and sorority leaders, and parents need to grow a spine. These kids are out of control. And if you won’t control them, the law will, and it will end up with your kid sitting next to a cellmate named Leroy, flushing whatever chance they had at a successful career down a nasty prison toilet. Until you do give them boundaries, all of the diplomas and awards you could hand out to them are for naught.
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