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I attended a career fair yesterday. It was a wondrous place. Euphoria hung heavy in the air. Oversized signage, cool swag, and brown-nosing abounded. Happy, official-looking folks were vying for my attention, shaking my hand, giving me glossy pamphlets, and otherwise luring me into their candidate pool. They were telling me how absolutely wonderful their company is. A few times, I almost got wrangled into being a scout camp counselor or a tour guide at some shady-looking resort (both of which, I may add, are not in my career plans at all).

1. Know what you want.

2. Research who is hiring for what you want.

3. Tweak your resume accordingly.

4. Dress for success.

5. Make a bee line for your targets.

Before you accept that job offer, there is something you should know: some jobs are inherently more dangerous than others. I mean, obviously, people die on the job in any profession- grocery store clerks, surgeons, football players, you name it. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics (BLS), however, some careers are known for leading the pack.

1. Fishermen – Three words for you: The. Perfect. Storm. Anyone who has seen the tragic 2000 film based on true events has an inkling of how perilous the lives of commercial fishermen can be. With 141.7 deaths per every 100,000 workers, commercial fishing leads the nation by far in deaths on the job, and it’s not hard to see why. They regularly brave the most turbulent ocean waters and weather to bring home a bigger catch. Their workplaces, unglamorous fishing vessels, are void of any safety features whatsoever. Pounding waves, merciless winds, loose rigging, and heavy alcohol use make it about the most unfriendly work environment imaginable.

2. Pilots – Don’t be fooled by statistics that airplanes are still the safest way to travel. That may be true for airline passengers, but it is not true for smaller commercial outfits. Just behind fishermen in ranking, 87.8 pilots per 100,000 died in 2006. This is not hard to imagine when you consider how many news reports you hear about smaller planes crashing. It would seem that leaving dry land, either by plane or by boat, naturally increases the risk factor.

3. Loggers – Combine snarling chainsaws, heavy machinery, and massive falling tree trunks, and you can almost guarantee that people are going to get hurt or killed. 82 loggers died for every 100,000 in 2006. Loggers are often pressured to work faster and harder. They often work on precarious mountain slopes. Any of these factors can and do come together to result in the death of a logger.

4. Structural iron and steel workers – Perhaps because of the insanely high, unprotected structures they must routinely work on, 61 structural metal workers died in 2006 for every 100,000. Little detail is offered as to the causes of the deaths. I’m assuming that many were from falling or from equipment malfunctions.

5. Refuse collectors – I’ll admit, this one has me puzzled. After all, picking up trashcans, tossing their contents into the back of a truck, and then doing the same at every house on the block hardly seems hazardous. Nevertheless, refuse collectors ranked fifth in deadliness with 41 deaths for every 100,000 workers. I suppose there may be risk from getting run over by the trash truck or other vehicles. Workers could accidentally fall into the back of the truck and get crushed by the compactor.

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Beyond the world of accounting, health care, or computer programming, lies a shadowy realm of flying saucers, undiscovered creatures, and restless spirits. Some people reject the typical 9-to-5 to venture into this realm and uncover the secrets therein. Instead of making sandwiches at Subway, they charge into haunted houses. Rather than making plans to strengthen The Man’s bottom line, they attempt to piece together alleged Bigfoot sightings or alien abductions.

These career paths are not for the faint-hearted. Any of these will almost certainly mean danger, spooky experiences, scanty paychecks, and/or ridicule from the mainstream public. If you think you have what it takes to be the next Fox Mulder, check out the following careers. The truth is out there, and you may be the one to find it:

1. Cryptozoologist – You’ve heard of Sasquatch, the Loch Ness Monster, and the Chupacabra? Cryptozoologists hang out with these guys. Or at least they’d like to. ‘Crypto’ means ‘hidden. ‘Zoo’ means ‘animals.’ Put them together and you have the study of "hidden animals," or animals that are not currently empirically proven to exist.

Cryptozoologists travel the globe investigating mystery animal sightings, collecting evidence (alleged Bigfoot droppings, Champ scales, etc.), and making the case to the skeptical science community that these animals may in fact exist. If this sounds like the career for you, you’d better hit those biology and zoology classes hard. Cryptozoologists, like plain old zoologists, have to know their animal biology front and back.

2. Ufologist – The last century has been fraught with sightings, conspiracies, videos, and hoaxes surrounding the alleged existence of Unidentified Flying Objects. From out-of-this world flying vehicles to abductions and experimentation on humans, authorities come up with absurd explanations while the public scratches their heads in confusion and fear.

That is where ufologists come in. Their mission is to uncover the truth about the existence of UFOs, to determine their origin, their intentions, and their relationship to the government. Occasionally, they get on a History Channel UFO documentary as an expert. If this sounds like your dream career, you’ll need to get versed in the ocean of reports, de-classified government documents, and investigations that are available.

3. Parapsychologist – For ages, people have exhibited some unexplainable talents (no, I don’t mean Paris’s appetite for idiocy and self-mockery). I’m talking about reading minds, moving things with pure mental willpower, and seeing things with your mind’s eye from hundreds of miles away. Parapsychology includes all of these phenomena and the possibility of the survival of consciousness beyond death.

Parapsychologists mostly try to prove the existence of these extraordinary abilities. They test people using random number generators. They put them in rooms and ask them to picture something very far away. Personally, I saw this kid in my high school throw a freshman without touching him. Much research has been done by both the government and private organizations, supposedly without any conclusive evidence that this phenomena actually exists. If you would like to be the first to finally prove that humans can bend spoons with their minds or cause things to spontaneously burst into flames, you will need to get updated on the history and theories of parapsychology and maybe take a few classes in Psychology.

4. Paranormal Investigator – With the success of the Sci Fi TV series Ghosthunters, this field has gained an enormous amount of popularity in the last few years. Death and what happens afterward will always excite a great deal of curiosity. Many people believe they have seen or communicated with spirits from beyond the grave.

As seen on Ghosthunters, paranormal investigators typically visit alleged haunted places (houses, hotels, graveyards, etc.). They take temperature and electromagnetic field readings. They record the entire process on video. Sometimes they find nothing. Other times they experience something frightening. If you are a night person and don’t mind those shivers running up your spine, you might consider this career. There’s no degree or research necessary, just a willingness to go into really scary places.

5. Conlinguist – If you’ve watched Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, or Star Trek, you’ve heard a variety of exotic languages spoken by Klingons, elves, and Hutts. As convincing as they sound, these are not languages that developed and grew naturally over centuries like Spanish or Hindi. They are constructed, or intentionally created, languages (I hate to break it to you). Conlinguists are the people who create these languages, usually for movies, books, or video games.

Conlinguists have to hold some primary knowledge of languages and how they work. They may borrow from real, existing languages, but the more convincing ones are constructed from the ground up. As one may imagine, there isn’t a lot of demand for conlinguists. Unless they create a wildly popular language like Klingon, which sports its own dictionary and set of language tapes, conlinguists must work other jobs to pay the bills. If you’re interested in this career path, learn a language and study linguistics.

About the author Marcus Varner earned his BA in English from Brigham Young University with a Creative Writing emphasis. He is currently in his second year at BYU’s lauded MBA program studying Marketing. He blogs, writes fiction and screenplays, loves movies, and can’t resist playing superheroes with his kids.